Saturday, September 8, 2012

Church Familes

It's been months since I've been to the church I grew up in. But I'm going tomorrow. I'm not sure why I'm going, I already have a church that I love! It doesn't make sense. I wanna go to see my grandpa, but i feel like that isn't the only reason I'm going. And what's worse is I'm scared to death to go. After everything that I've been through there, why would I wanna even step into that place again? I keep asking myself that. But I can't seem to find an answer. I feel like I wanna go there to prove a point that I'm happier now that I left. But that can't be it. That's just selfish beyond belief.  So I'm laying here at 1:30am typing, and trying to think things through. Am I doing the right thing?? Or should I find a way to get to my church?? I feel like it'd be good to go to church with my family for a change. But at the same time this church isn't my family anymore. They haven't been in 2 yrs. It hurts so much to think of what I have been through and have lost everyone of those people that I knew there. No one talks to me except one person and even with them I feel like that their just trying to be nice, but I know them well enough to know that ain't the cause. I'm not going to know hardly anyone there, and I get to deal with somethings. Don't know what they could be, if they happen. But I'm ready. And I'll tell it straight up how a church is supposed to be. And if your wondering I'll tell you.

A church is supposed to be a family. Always there for one another, no matter what. They don't judge you by the clothes you wear, the way you talk, and most importantly your past that they don't even know a thing about. And see that's what i have learned by going to the church I've been going to recently. I love it there. No one knows my past, they don't automatically ask a 100 questions about my life. They wanna get to know me for who I am now, and not who I was. I mean i coulda had the best life ever, but they don't care about my past, they care about my future and my walk with God. That to me is a church. That's not just a church, that's a true family.. Therefore it's a church family.

I'm 18 years old, I left my church to start fresh and with a better walk with God. And it's been the best thing I have ever done.

In 1 Corinthians 12:14 it says "For the body does not consist of one member, but of many." When I read that it reminds me that I have found my family in Christ at this church. It tells me that this is where I belong. I have never wanted to do the things I wanna do with this youth group. I'm definitely coming out of my comfort zone, and I've only been going there full for about 5 months. It's amazing what God can do in your life in that short amount of time. And put the people you need in your life. Which I am so thankful for. I'm so glad I got to make friends with so many people this summer going to that church, and the relationships are so strong. And they love me for ME! And that's a amazing fact now a days.

To end this I just wanna ask that you continue to pray for me as I'm getting older and growing more in love, and strong in my faith. I just wanna be able to continue in that which I know I can, it's just nice to have people praying that  I'm going the right direction! Thanks!

And thanks for taking the time out of your day to take a look at this little confusing post. Remember to stay positive, and pray about everything you do, and follow the path God has laid out for you, as he has for me.

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